Vocations

One of the first things that drew me to my Religious Family was our Mother Foundress, Mother Luisita. When my Spiritual Director at the time recommended that I visit the Carmelite Sisters, I “googled” them and the first thing that came up was Mother Luisita’s picture. I remember being struck by the peacefulness and joy on her face. Although I couldn’t describe it then, or even be fully aware of what was happening in my heart, I felt I needed to know more about her and her way of life.

As I read her biography, I automatically felt drawn to her, as if I already knew her. On a practical level, she was born in a town not far from where I was born in Mexico, but as I read more about her life, her great confidence in God really struck me. She lived during the time when Mexico was under religious persecution and when being a Catholic could cost you your life, especially if you were a priest or a religious; and yet here was Mother Maria Luisa Josefa, founding a Community of Sisters in the midst of it! What courage, I thought, but more than anything, what love she must have had for Our Lord that she was willing to risk everything so that He would be loved and served.

The witness of her yes to God’s will, her faith, her trust, and her love for God alone really inspired me. At that time in my life, I could not name it, but now I recognize it as the gifts Our Lord had given her to serve His Church in a particular way and bring about His Kingdom. Now I have the greatest blessing of sharing in her charism and to be one of her daughters. Although she lived over 85 years ago, there is something timeless about her. She is a great example to us of saying yes to Our Lord at all times, and as she always said, “Be what we are supposed to be, a Saint!”

I am particularly drawn by Carmel’s approach to God. In my freshman year of college, I was received into the fullness of the Church through the sacrament of Confirmation and took as my patroness St. Teresa of Jesus for her doctrine and teaching on the Indwelling of the Holy Trinity. In college, I was also a member of the Servants of the Eucharistic Heart of Jesus Household which emphasized a spirit of prayer and Eucharistic devotion with service outreach in imitation of Our Blessed Mother at the Annunciation and Visitation. The desires of my heart all came together when I met the Carmelite Sisters of the Most Sacred Heart of Los Angeles during my sophomore year at Franciscan University. It was love, Love, LOVE! I was drawn to the sisters by the gentle peace they exuded and their joyful witness. It was obvious that they had an ardent love for God and His Church. There was this surge of heart, this unexplainable exponential growth in my desire to give myself in a radical way to God and serve Him and His Church. I began to wonder if God might be calling me to be His bride and a sister to His people. As I learned more about the sisters and spent more time with them, their charism and mission resonated deeply in my heart. I was very much drawn in by Mother Luisita’s story and the community’s Mexican roots, which is something I have always treasured being a first-generation Mexican American myself. After visiting the sisters at their Motherhouse in Alhambra, California, I had this inner conviction that if God were indeed calling me to religious life, it had to be with this community.

Among the things Our Lord presented to me as I was discerning my vocation was the tangible unity among our sisters. Because I was on a silent retreat when I first encountered our community, my experience of the sisters was largely limited to seeing them quietly going between their respective point A and point B. Yet, as I would see them, I was struck –  though they all wore the same thing, I could readily sense the uniqueness of each sister, and at the same time, there was a mysterious thread that seemed to run between and among them. This thread was deeper, more meaningful, more beautiful, and more dynamic than a mere “sameness.” I truly believe that our Mother Luisita obtained for me a special grace to tangibly experience her spirit alive and flowing through each of those sisters:  the same spirit, the same gift of the Holy Spirit, incarnated in the individual humanity of each sister.

What a gift to now to be numbered among these sisters, to hold fast to “Union, union, union,” as Mother would say, especially when our broken humanity seems to get in the way, to ask for the grace to allow her spirit to be enfleshed in me and to open my eyes to see how it is enfleshed in each of my sisters.

Our new school opened with only 5 grades; adding a grade after that each year. I happened to be going into the 5^th. A Carmelite sister in every classroom was the way it was then. Five siblings, Catholic mom at home and dad to work daily. I would see the sisters together…on the playground, in the car, in the church. Just wanted to “be one of them”. Sometimes after school I was their “pious companion” to pick up bread donations or stop at the bank. None of them was grumpy; they smiled all the time. They played ball with us. I learned from them about my faith, what being Catholic meant, and the years went on.

A teenager going forth in life. High school had different sisters, another order.  But I went back to the Carmelites at their Retreat House while in high school to volunteer on weekends and summers. They were joyful; I never heard them complaining. They always made work look easy. I watched them when they were praying quietly. I heard them chanting on Saturday afternoons in the chapel. I still just wanted to “be one of them.”

Yes, when I didn’t tell the truth, when I was a smart aleck with my mouth in the classroom, when I was haughty with others, the sisters were able to prudently call it to my attention with honesty and compassion.  Oh, how sorry I was that I had disappointed those whom I loved and looked to imitate.  Through my tears, I experienced truth and courage. I had learned manners and etiquette and how to be family at home, and those lessons were reinforced with the sisters. Have I ever regretted asking to be admitted as a Carmelite Sister? Never. The ending to this short account is that I would not trade growing up in the 50s compared with the pressures that teenagers face in today’s world. God is real; Carmelites belong to Him and they are real.